Learning Journey - What and Why and So What?

Marsiling RC Zone 7

What? On 3rd September 2019, we went to a Residents' Committee at Marsiling for Learning Journey. When we were there, Nick briefed us on what we were going to do (house visits, cleaning etc) for that day and the things to look out for in the process of volunteering and afterwards, we moved off to the respective houses.

For my part, Karen and I went to visit one of the residents, Mdm Yap, and brought her out for lunch at the nearby coffeeshop. Mdm Yap was an elderly who stayed alone, as her husband was hospitalized due to medical conditions. She recently undergone an operation on her foot, and due to her having diabetes, her wound took long to recover resulting in her having to sit on the wheelchair when we were out. After fetching her from her place, Karen and I then brought her to the RC to do a quick checkup where she also had fun talking to the nurses. Next, we brought her around the neighborhood to look at the new shops that have opened but she has yet visit. Our initial plan was to bring her for lunch, but we changed the plan to eating after we tour around the neighborhood as Mdm Yap has eaten some food and did not want to eat at that moment. As we walked around the neighborhood, Mdm Yap told us a lot about herself, how active she was in participating in temple and community activities when she was younger. As she was telling us about her past and her family, she sounded depressed as she felt she did not have the freedom to move around herself now because of the wound on her foot. We then comforted her that she was recovering well from the photos she showed us about the wound.

As we walk, we moved further and further from Mdm Yap’s place and we asked if she wants to go back to have lunch or dinner. She said the food there does not taste nice and thus refused to eat there but requested to go to the market nearby to take a look. So, we went to the market instead to have Bak Kut Teh (the one that is famous in Marsiling area) and Mdm Yap actually liked the food there. After eating, Mdm Yap bought popiah back as snacks and we sent her home after that.

Why? From the few hours spent with Mdm Yap, I feel that what she wanted was to have someone to talk to and eat with. She is depressed about the inconvenience in her mobility and the fact that she cannot go out alone for it is not safe. She is also lonely as there was no one she can talk to daily as her children only visits once in a week or two. From this, I also learnt about a common worry that most elderly have, which is the fear of troubling others. My grandma also feels bad when she needs us to help her with some of the things she cannot do by herself, and will feel like she is always disturbing us.

So what? A lot of elderly feel that they are being a burden to others and depressed by that. Up till now, I am still trying to let my grandma know that she is not troubling us and that we are glad to be of help. I think one way to not let them have this thought might be getting them to guide you on those things that they know, so that they feel they are of help to others too. I had a little conclusion about the problem of elderly feeling lonely at home that, if everyone does their part in taking care their own family members, it would have been more effective and these elderlies would have been more well taken care of. This also made me reflect on myself whether I am doing enough for my family. I strongly believe to start from one’s own family is the best start to any community work. I will also take more initiative to help my grandmother instead of her having to ask before we do anything.